Yes to Heaven
by tupiniquimgirl
Summary: For a demon, time doesn't exist, time is a vague and human concept. For Eden, time is the crucial unit of measure that allows her to be reborn in several different human eras. For Sebastian, his master's cousin has an unforgettable soul that allows him to experience the feeling of falling from heaven again. [Sebastian/OC] *cover: @clivenzu (Instagram)
1. punished angel

01\. _punished angel._

_Like a barge at sea, In the storm I stay clear, cause I've got my mind on you — **yes to heaven**, lana del rey._

* * *

**Her** name was Anadriel, and she was a celestial being, throughout her existence she lived within the celestial grounds. At the beginning of all known things, she was enchanted.

Anadriel loved very much all that her creator created, from the humblest of stars to the entire universe. She wandered through the stars touching them with her fingers, floated into constellations, and observed remote planets.

Anadriel knew that many of her siblings didn't have this opinion, but she fell in love with everything so quickly that the mere idea of existing to observe left her hostage to all splendor.

In times when the history of human beings was not even close to being initiated, they were created in pairs, Azafriel was Anadriel's pair and was the being with whom she shared her adventures through the creations.

The two were angels and Anadriel's crucial task was to assist the archangels in their battles; she used to clean and polish their weaponry, to serve them as needed.

"There is a rumour that the creator will create more beings this time," Anadriel joyfully commented, the spectrum of her essence becoming more enlightened. "They say they will have the spirit of the creator itself within them."

"And are you satisfied with that, Anadriel?" Azafriel's resounding voice expressed dissatisfaction. "The cherubim comment that the creator plans to empower them. Power over us."

The light in Anadriel became less glowing.

"But what's wrong, Azafriel?" She questioned without understanding her brother's sudden anger. "We were created to be servants..."

"You don't understand, sister," his voice became soft. "The creator will not always make the right decisions."

"Don't say something like that! Our creator never errs!" Anadriel's calm tone attempted to circumvent her brother's blasphemy. "Brother, I've never heard you say that."

"You don't understand, Anadriel,' he continued. "You should try to understand before it's too late."

"What are you talking about, brother?"

"I should hear the rumors, Lúcifer seems to share the same thoughts as us, I am just looking after you, sister."

Anadriel raised the luminous handles.

"Please, Azafriel, be careful. There is nothing in this kingdom that our almighty Lord will not hear."

That was the last conversation Anadriel shared with her brother, the creator began it creation and a third of the celestial beings were listening to Lúcifer very loud theories. Anadriel was lost, her generous spirit was the essence of love, in it was the gift of empathy and none of Anadriel's feelings could be negative, she couldn't consider her brothers traitors.

She loved them too much, more than her own existence, and also loved their creator.

On a moment when the great evil that surrounded the universe in that place of its existence where time hadn't yet been created, Anadriel sharpened the sword of a seraphim when the first great convocation took place in heaven.

It was the first moment that Anadriel met the creator face to face, and the last time she could see the great heavenly terrains.

After that, there was the fall.

And for her indecision, Anadriel was punished.

* * *

It was her first incarnation, she was one of the daughters of a weaver, in that life her name was Sara'el and she was the older sister and the pride of her house.

The memories of her heavenly soul were intact in her mind and she knew exactly what she should do.

Her uncle Ahaziah had abandoned the laws of the creator, had given his soul to a demon through a contract.

Ahaziah gave the demon hired the name Hieu.

"What was your punishment, sister?" he once asked. "Why didn't you fall with us?"

"The creator has punished me in being reborn and living the misfortunes of a human life, I have to kill a brother with my own free will," she said softly, her brother's eyes were full of indifference and yet she felt nothing but pure love for him. "It's the only way to break the cycle."

"Will you try to kill me, then?" A smile of scarium formed on Hieu's thin lips.

"No."

His expression was empty.

"And why not?"

Sara'el laughed quietly, shaking her head.

Hieu squeezed his jaw realizing his sister inside the fragile human shell, realizing that she was the only one who was not changing.

"What are you talking about? I would never kill a brother."

Sara'el died at the age of seventeen; Hieu's contract was still active when it happened.

He held her hand watching life move away from her brown eyes; with it, he was able to experience the remnant of heaven that he once left behind.

* * *

Finding a brother wasn't a recurring occurrence, she noted. Since her first life, she had lived three more to find a brother again.

In this case, it was a sister.

Under the orders of the contract, her sister was given the name Suzanne. It was France in the years that would one day be called the middle ages, the name her mother of that life gave her had been Florence.

Her father of that life made a contract with her sister to get the wealth he had, all the land and all the precious things he continued to receive was the fruit of what Suzanne had given him. Suzanne lived in her house in the guise of a nanny, Florence remembered how her fingers brushed her hair.

"Humans are funny creatures, Florence. You see, after all this time they can retain knowledge, they prefer material wealth," she heard Suzanne say. "I advise you to try to know earthly pleasures, to find consolation in someone's arms."

Florence smiled at the mirror.

"I am happy to have found you again, sister."

"Me too, and believe me, happiness is a foreign notion when you're a demon," Florence felt her sister kissing her temple.

Suzanne's contract was short and she left before Florence's death.

Florence died at the age of fifteen, but the demon who had been with her in that life placed peonies on her tombstone.

* * *

Eight lives later, she was reborn as Jiang Feng Mian and she felt something strange happening. Her memory was fading.

She remembered that she had once been a celestial being, but it was a blurred and unclear memory.

She didn't remember her first name and the image of the heavenly lands looked like a broken mirror in her memory.

Jiang Feng Mian was born to be a courtesan, she was sophisticated and adorable in the eyes of outsiders, but her mind was a storm. She dreamed of all the moments of her previous lives, she dreamed of her brothers and sisters, but it seemed difficult to access those memories in that lifetime.

To her surprise, one night while she was dancing, one of her brothers came in through the door. Her heart sped up, she hardly found her voice when she recognized his soul.

"Azafriel," she murmured as the warm tears rolled down her face, the most beautiful silk in the market embracing her body as she wrapped her arms around her brother's shoulders.

He did not immediately reciprocate, but then she felt his arms around his waist.

"Sister," he leaned his lips on her black and scented hair. "I finally found you."

Azafriel's name was Wen in that life, and Feng Mian was happy to remember his brother.

His contract was with a young courtesan like Feng Mian — she was trying to get revenge for her mother's death and Wen was there to help her achieve her goal.

"So your punishment is to kill a demon? We can look for one, it wouldn't be such an impossible task if I helped you," Wen told her when she told of her punishment.

"No, I can't kill any of you, Wen. I love them with all my heart, I wouldn't know how to move on after killing—"

"Listen to me sister, nothing is like before. There is no such union among demons, we are not the same as we were before the fall," he laid his hand on her head. "How would you kill a demon, after all? You look fragile like any other human."

"This is one of the few clear memories I still have. The creator told me that when the will to kill a brother blossoms in me, the strength I need will also blossom."

Wen sighed.

"But it never bloomed, didn't it?"

Feng Mian rested her forehead on his forehead.

"Not once in twelve lives." She whispered lovingly.

Wen kissed her cheek.

"Be careful, sister. Your soul seems pure and appetizing to any demon, don't go near them willingly in any of your lives, can you do this?"

"Yes, thank you, Wen."

Wen's contract ended thirty years after Feng Mian's death.

He held her in his arms when she died with the age of 14, poisoned by another courtesan.

Azafriel cursed the heavens for reminding him of what it was like to feel love.

* * *

In the twentieth life of that punished angel, she was reborn as a noble in Victorian England.

Francis' heart hurt when she realized that only one of her twin children was crying at birth, the second one coming out of her womb seemed to be asleep and her tiny baby lips seemed to be smiling.

The boy and the girl, however, were born healthy.

From that day on, Eden and Edward were the beloved children of the Midford house.

* * *

**[author's note]**

_this is my first fanfic of Kuroshitsuji, english isn't my first language, so if you find any grammar mistakes, please, feel free to point out. Don't forget to left your review! Thanks for reading this story :3_


	2. garden of eden

02\. _Garden of Eden._

_This is a happy end cause' you don't understand everything you have done, why's everything so wrong. _— _**new soul,** yael naim._

* * *

As a baby, Eden had those very intelligent eyes that were sometimes able to leave Francis surprised. Edward gave the nanny some severe night headaches, but Eden was of a stillness that reminded Francis of her brother.

She reminded her so much of his brother that the first time Vincent came to visit his nephews, he stayed with Eden on his arms while talking. The baby kept quiet though awake, her intelligent eyes watching her uncle's face and giving baby smiles whenever he touched her head or cheek.

As rigid as she was, Francis had to admit that she made lovely children. Vincent came whenever he had time, it was a little funny to see her brother always sunk in work coming to her house to play with his nephews. Vincent seemed simply very much in love with the two, especially with Eden — the one most like him.

Francis was not surprised when he verbalized his desire to have an heir. Rachel was also wanting to have a child, as Francis assumed that it would not be long before the couple finally had their own children.

"She's very quiet," Vincent whispered, swinging the baby in his arms. "Is that normal?"

"She's an educated baby. You couldn't expect less of a daughter of mine," Francis said proudly, shoulders erect and arms folded.

Vincent laughed in a low voice.

"Yes, as expected of you, sister," he added smiling. "But she still has my blood, that explains a lot, doesn't it, Eddie?"

Francis rolled her eyes at him.

She really liked her daughter's behavior, only if she felt a little jealous of her not to look as much like her as she would like. Alexis told her that it was too early to define a baby's personality, but Francis believed that her daughter already had too much personality to be ignored.

* * *

Alexis loved his children from the first time he saw them. Edward — at the tender age of one year — was a little gentleman, and Eden... Oh, Eden... His daughter was a very precocious child. At such a young age, she had strong opinions of the things she liked and disliked.

Although she spoke no more than a couple of words and never cried, she frowned whenever she was forced to do what she didn't want, and had her own way of manipulation to get what she wanted.

It was strange to notice such a deep characteristic in his one-year-old daughter.

She also enjoyed listening to stories; Edward was not patient enough to sit and listen, but Eden could listen to her father talk for hours without getting bored, which was also not a behavior of children her age.

"You care too much, Alexis. Your daughter is smart, there's nothing wrong with that," Angelina Durless, Vincent's wife's sister and a former friend, pointed to raising an eyebrow. "You should enjoy while she's so little, she's going to grow up and become a young lady, you know? You'll have more work ahead."

Angelina raised her indicator as she spoke, one hand over her waist and a smile on her lips.

"She's just... So different from Edward," Alexis muttered, not feeling exactly disgruntled that his daughter was different from his son, only sad that he didn't understand her as he would have liked.

Eden, who listened to the conversation leaning against the edge of the wall at the office door, left the place where she was and went towards her father. Alexis' eyes opened when his daughter put her hand on his and smiled.

An illuminated and precious smile.

"My little daughter is so cute!" He finally exclaimed, raising her from the ground and putting her on his lap.

Angelina laughed quietly, nodding her head.

* * *

When Eden and Edward were near their fourth birthday, their younger sister was born.

Little Elizabeth was the new light of the house, Edward was happy with the new sister, was delighted since the baby faced him with adorable green eyes.

Francis' fears of Eden's possible jealousy of her younger sister were in vain; Eden loved Lizzy as much as Edward, but, unlike Edward's childlike joy at having a young sister to protect, Eden was always trying to learn from the nanny how to take care of Elizabeth.

Francis and Alexis were happy to see the union of their children.

A year later, the Phantomhive twins were born.

* * *

Ciel quickly became the most popular of the twins, the younger of the two being too ill to go out with the family.

Eden found herself seriously annoyed to only see one of them every time her uncles visited her. While visiting his uncles' mansion for the first time, Eden took advantage of his uncle and aunt distraction with Lizzy and Ciel to leave the garden. She walked into the house with slow steps, her low shoes made no sound at all on the floor.

"Tanaka, can you take me to the room where he is?" Asked the butler of the residence, Tanaka gave a gentle smile.

"Understood. Please come with me, my lady."

Tanaka guided her through the corridors of the mansion, and Eden's determined eyes observed the place she had never been before.

She saw them when they were still babies because her aunt took them to the Midford manor, now they were both almost seven years old and Eden has not seen the youngest of the twins since birth.

Tanaka opened the bedroom door and revealed the little child on the other side; he had sharp eyes and a doll face identical to his twin who was playing happily with Elizabeth outside the building.

He looked at her looking nervous and held his fingers tightly to the point that Eden could see the white on the joints of his little fingers.

"Today looks very beautiful, doesn't it?" Eden started, her jumps hit the ground when she took a step towards the child. He jumped off in fright and Eden stopped in place. "You've grown a lot, when I saw you last time, you're was just a little bean."

Eden smiled kindly, the little boy still seemed suspicious.

"Do you remember me?" He asked, shyly.

Eden laughed.

"Of course! How would I forget my baby cousin?"

She approached him when she realized that he seemed a little more convinced.

"So, what do you think about playing a little bit in here?"

"But why do you want to play here? The day is beautiful outside..." he turned his head to the side, his voice seeming overwhelmed.

"Hm? But it's boring outside without you."

He opened more his eyes looking even more adorable.

"Really?"

"Yes. All I could think of was 'how can I play if my other baby cousin isn't here?', so I came looking for you." His cheeks were dyed with a shade of pink. "But if you don't want to play, I can go out..."

"No! I mean, don't leave, please." He lowered his head, Eden was now close enough to put her hand on top of his head.

"I'll stay. But now, what do you like to play with?"

Behind the two, Tanaka gave a soft smile before closing the door.

Eden played with him all afternoon, soon discovering that her other cousin was smart and could play chess very well at the age of seven. Eden hadn't regretted spending this time with her cousin; she found herself joining him very quickly.

"Eden, will you come back and play with me again?"

He asked her looking with his beautiful blue eyes. Eden bent down to level to his height and gave him a kiss on the forehead.

"Of course, yes, I really enjoyed playing today. From now on, you're my favorite cousin, but it's our secret, right?"

He nodded with a broad smile.

"Yes!"

"Let's do it like this, this will be the symbol of our secret," Eden raised her index finger and took her cousin's little hand, she interlaced her index finger into his index finger.

The child observed the gesture looking fascinated.

Eden didn't hold back her smile as she left her cousin's room, he was so lovely.

* * *

At Lady Camellia College for girls,

Eden excelled.

She enjoyed reading very much and this resulted in an unbridled passion for debate; she had been sent to punishment or received severe slaps on the palms of her hands with a ruler for disrespect to professors.

Eden simply didn't like unfair rules and her professors — although they were women — were always talking about why women were weaker and therefore needed strong men nearby, or how the subjects she was learning seemed futile in relation to what her brother was learning. Eden's mother was strong and her aunts too, Eden couldn't see how to make inferior women more apt to contribute to the society in which they lived.

Over the years, Eden has discovered a painful truth. Women were not created to contribute to society, they were an ornament, like a hair ornament. They were raised to bear children and stay behind their husbands, always being obedient, delicate and a perfect wall flower.

Eden found that not all women had the same — although still minimal — freedom that the women in her family had. Some women couldn't leave their homes because their husbands were the only providers of sustenance and they wouldn't get any decent jobs if they left home, the worst is that many of these men on whom they depended were insane, violent and everybody in that rotten society would be on their side anyway.

Deeply disappointed with the society in which they lived, Eden found a woman who thought like her: her aunt Angelina. Her mother was everything violent men hated and so Eden admired her, but she still had a firm foot on the archaic social laws in which women simply had to conform to the life they had.

Her aunt Angelina had a more modernist mindset; she was a doctor and was always being exposed to the mistrust of others simply because of her gender. Talking to her aunt Angelina, Eden found another ally, her aunt Rachel - wife of her uncle Vincent. She was such an intelligent woman and had so much to teach her, Rachel showed her a wonderful read about a woman who also thought like all of them, Mary Wollstonecraft.

Eden also realized that reading Mary's work was not well regarded in society and what her aunts did was apparently an insult, so they had their political books so well hidden.

Eden found that she wanted to be like her aunts when she grew up.

* * *

"Waaaaa- That was scary..." Ciel later commented on being defeated by Elizabeth and Eden's mother during training. Eden put another piece of cake on her other cousin's plate, seeing the interaction of Ciel and Lizzy.

"It's because mother is so strict." Lizzy tried to comfort her little fiance.

Eden listened to his cousin's next words.

"Aunt Francis is pretty, but... Such a strong wife..." Eden pay attention to her cousin's next words. "That scares me, I'm glad that you're the one who's going to be my wife."

Eden stood up to see her sister's mortified expression, she caressed Lizzy's hair curls and stooped down next to ciel.

"Ciel, there's nothing wrong with a girl being strong. And there's nothing wrong with a boy being strong too, so you can be a very strong and amazing couple." Eden explained softly, seeing her cousin frowning and seeming to think of her words.

"But I want to be the only one to protect Lizzy." Ciel countered by appearing unconvinced.

"I know, little one. But you want to protect Lizzy because you like her so much, don't you?" He agreed. "Lizzy also likes you and she also wants to protect you. Isn't it, Lizzy?"

The little girl nodded vehemently with pink cheeks.

Ciel gave a smile, at last.

"I understand. So let's protect each other, Lizzy!" Ciel spoke and her little sister seemed happy again.

Eden smiled, glad that a simple explanation had avoided a problem that could perhaps become bigger.

She went near the little boy at the table that was in silence. Eden stared at him fondly.

"Do you want play chess while they play together?"

The other twin consented, watching his brother and Lizzy play together. At least with Eden, he no longer felt so lonely.

"Yes!"

* * *

**_[author's note] _**

_Thank you for those who commented in the fic. Thanks for Haruka Chouko and the anonymous reader for the reviews!_

_And please, let your review before go, all the constructive opinions are welcome!_

_*English isn't my first language, please, feel free to point out any grammar mistakes 3_


	3. starlight

03\. _Starlight_.

_Where did you go? I should know, but it's cold and I don't wanna be lonely, so show me the way home, I can't lose another life._ — **_ilomilo_**, _billie eilish. _

* * *

Seeing her sister dancing on top of the ballet shoes, Elizabeth realized that she seemed lighter than the air. She found Eden's ability to dance so incredible, although Elizabeth always tried to look naturally feminine, it seemed difficult for Lizzy, compared to her older sister, femininity seemed a simply part of Eden's personality.

For Lizzy, her older sister was an inspiration.

The Midford family were all knights of the Queen, thanks to their skill with fencing, Lizzy was her mother's rare jewel. For the younger Midford, her status as genius did not serve if her mother would always compare them — Elizabeth and Eden — to that aspect.

Lizzy had never seen her sister get angry or question their mother, even with unfair comparison, Eden always congratulated Elizabeth on her victories.

Her sister was the most beautiful sugar fairy that Lizzy ever had seen.

She was very pround of her older sister, Eden is gentle and humble, a kind person and Lizzy adored her for all the precious moments that they shared.

Palms stormed the hall after Eden's solo spectacle, and Lizzy stood up to grace her sister appropriately.

Eden might not be so good at fencing, but she was so talented at other things, Lizzy just wanted her mother to see it one day.

* * *

Eden was terrible with a sword in her hands, she knew that. The real problem was being born in a family where everyone was particularly very good with fencing and undergoing pressure for not being as good as her younger sister.

Elizabeth was incredibly talented, and Eden was proud of her. But particularly, Eden was also not interested in being good at fencing, she had other purposes in mind.

Currently, her search for knowledge was leading her to the scandalous paths of politics.

Eden was naturally good at gathering information, people felt comfortable near of her and guiding the subject of conversation strategically, getting valuable information in a few minutes.

"I'm glad to see you in this humble amateur spectacle, Sir Phipps."

The pale young man with white hair and stoic expression kept his face severe.

"I appreciate, Lady Midford, but it was only my duty as a servant of your majesty."

Eden nodded, the fun didn't leave her bright green eyes.

"I'm still grateful, even though it's an obligation. Did you like the spectacle?"

Charles Phipps wed his gaze, almost shy standing in front of the girl.

"You looked great, my lady."

Eden smiled at him.

"I'm happy to hear it, my lord," She said, her seductive tone of voice hovered between the conversation. "Forgive me if it are just rumors, but I heard that you and Charles Grey were being evaluated by your majesty."

"I'm afraid so, lady Midford."

"Your family must be proud."

"Certainly."

"I feel like you're performing well, Mr. Phipps. You always seemed to me an honorable gentleman," Eden sighed with false disappointment. "I'd really like to know what it's like to work with you one day."

She dropped her eyelids, opening her rosy lips, a blush appeared on her cheeks. Charles Phipps widened his eyes watching the girl's reactions and then returned to maintaining his stoic expression.

He wiped his throat.

"I appreciate your trust, My lady."

A little satisfied smile took Eden's lips watching the young man walk away.

A week later, she received a letter from Queen Victoria herself seeking to meet her.

* * *

Eden held the cup handle with her thin fingers.

"Charles was really anxious about your presence, I'm afraid you won a suitor, my girl." The Queen Victoria said with a smile, Eden hid her lips with the cup and gradually lowered it.

"I do not doubt my lord's kindness, but I must address that my visit is more focused on a possible service coming from your Majesty."

Eden knew that there were not many ways to grow up before the nobility, seducing Charles Phipps' heart was not something she could be proud of, but as much as her morals didn't agree, Eden had a notion of her talent for influencing people.

Her mother probably wouldn't agree with her methods, but Eden had managed to have a meeting with the queen herself because of them.

"I understand. You're not really interested in Charles."

"Forgive me for wasting your time, Your Majesty."

The queen shook her hand in the air.

"It wasn't a waste, dear. I don't tell everyone about this, but I can really admire a woman who can use her femininity as a weapon."

The two shared a smile.

Eden realized that the woman could understand perfectly about her situation just by Queen Victoria understanding look.

* * *

At the age of fourteen, Eden became active for the kingdom of England.

Her tasks were simple at first, visitsome ladies, take letters from the Queen to them and observe, get information through futile conversations and that if there was not enough attention, could go through only rumors.

Rumors had their real background, so Eden always started with them.

Passing information to the Queen through letters became a constant task, there were rotten apples among the nobles who thought their social position made them untouchable — and by some way, it did, it was Eden's duty to ensure the information necessary for the Queen get close to the guilty.

She would soon be a debutant, at the age of fifteen, her work was being done impeccably and this gave her the possibility of a fixed position.

Eden, however, became seriously ill jumping three weeks for the day of the ball on which she would debut.

* * *

"Is she going to be fine?" Francis questioned by looking at her sleeping daughter's face, she would appear to be in a state of deep sleep and her fever didn't cease.

"It's exhaustion, probably. She was working tirelessly trying to maintain her position with the Queen." Angelina touched her niece's hair. "I'm going to spend the night here in case it gets more serious."

"You better go rest too, Angelina. You're pregnant, you shouldn't get tired."

The scarlet-haired woman passed her hand over her belly.

"It's fine. I'm fine. I like to take care of my niece."

In Morpheus's arms, Eden's dreams were so lived that they could be confused with memories. She was in an extensive space fully illuminated, with so much clarity that she wondered how she could see.

"_Desire isn't a sin_."Someone said in a strange language, she had never heard before and didn't know how she understood it.

That voice was close to her, deep and rich, like Chinese silk. Although her body was different —she didn't feel material, it was like she was everywhere, as extensive as that place, she felt that being was near her, but they can't touch each other.

"_The creator determined it was blasphemy, so it is_." Her voice responded in the same language as being in front of her, but she was hesitant and trembling.

"_Are you so devout, so loyal, hm? Is there really nothing your selfless soul desires?_"

She knew the answer, she could tell.

**_You're the reason I'm not selfless._**

She could not corrupt him, to make him fall for a forbidden feeling she cultivated, which she chose to keep and feed alone.

"_I_ _have no desires_."

The sound of a soft profound sound was his laugh.

"_My soul is heavy with selfishness," _His voice sounded velvety."_but I wouldn't get rid of my desire, I adore those moorings that pull me into the underneath of this hypocrisy_." She felt the bitter in that being voice when she heard his words.

"_I don't want such a fate for you. You are the most fascinating and strong archangel, the creator wouldn't make you suffer a fate like that_." She whispered with her brittle voice, he had so much power over her with words only.

"_It doesn't matter. I will not be dissatisfied, as long as my desire falls with me and by the way my desire lies..._ " She could hear the tragic fun his voice was carrying."_I will look forward to our beautifully shared fate, starlight_."

Eden woke up covered in sweat, her breath was panting and her emerald eyes were fixed on the ceiling above her room. She was still shaking, her heart beat hard full of anguish.

She tried to repeat the word he called her, but failed, did not naturally come out as in her dream.

Eden just couldn't repeat that language.

She at least knew what it meant.

"Starlight." murmured for no one, Eden's small hand shook the fabric of her sweater above her chest. "Who are you?"

* * *

**_[author's note]_**

_Thank you to **Manon**, **Kemi** and **Reo-kun** for the wonderful reviews! I really appreciate you taking a little interest in the story!_

_Please help this author through comments, so I'll know what you're finding from the story and if I've made any mistakes I can fix (grammatical mainly)_

_Thank you xx_


	4. nostalgic

04\. _Nostalgic_.

_Somewhere deep in the dark a howling beast hears us talk, I dare you to close your eyes and see all the colors in disguise._ — _**yellow light**, of monsters and men. _

* * *

Eden was near the Christmas tree at the Midford manor, stared at the star at the top of the tree and raised an eyebrow as she faced the various christmas ball guests.

Her life as a true lady recently began, going to the balls was part of her obligation, making herself known to get a good marriage. Eden tried to explain to her mother about her minimal interest in getting married, but it was useless, Francis would drag her to all the dances she could.

Eden talked to her father, Marquis Midford, Alexis. Her father wouldn't go against her mother, and her aunts were also on Francis' side.

She wanted that dance to end quickly, she was angry and sleepy. Her nights were full of dreams with moments she never lived and which affected her deeply.

Her eyes widened as he saw the little children walk through the door. The two were adorable wearing matching clothes, Eden just wanted to squeeze them both in a hug.

"My little ones!" She exclaimed coming near them and lowering down a little to stay at the same level as the children's height.

"Hello, Eden!" They said at the same time, and Eden's heart was filled with warmth by the lovely action of the two cousins.

She hugged them, they laughed when she went on to kiss them on their chubby cheeks.

"Don't leave Eden near your children, sister, she'll steal them one day." Her aunt Angelina said, putting a hand in front of her mouth while she laugh.

"Aunt Rachel made them so cute," Eden wept messing up the grey hairs of her cousins still hugging them.

"You're squeezing me too much, Eden!" Her younger cousin laughed getting another kiss on the cheek.

"I'm sorry, it's just that you two are really cute tonight!" She stood up, staring at her uncles. "Merry Christmas, Aunt Rachel and Uncle Vincent."

"Look, she even talks like a lady now," Vincent teased wideging his eyes with a false unbelief, Eden pushed her lips forward.

"Why are you so mean, Uncle Vincent?" she joked.

"Stop teasing her, darling. Merry Christmas, Eden!" Rachel hugged her niece.

Her cousins and Lizzy ran out around the hall, his eyes shining with curiosity. As the new lady of society, Eden followed with futile conversations to entertain the guests of her parents, the dance began and everyone picked up their peers quickly, Eden stayed away feeling that his gloves too longs left his arms scratching.

She wished to be a child again, be considered a child to play with her cousins and her sister. No one cared how she behaved before she was considered a lady.

"Being a lady is horrible." whispered to herself, trapped inside her tight corset and her expensive pink dress.

"Excuse me, my lady, could you give me the honor of a dance?"

Eden raised her gaze and her eyes faced his uncle's blue eyes.

She smiled, behind her uncle and dancing with Edward, was her Aunt Rachel.

"Please, my lord, I'd be honored."

Eden put her hand on Vincent's, they were soon dancing.

"You've improved a lot, I remember your shoes crushing my toes when you were a child."

She laughed, deflected her gaze.

"And I'm still a child." She spoke in a low voice, honestly, she was a little tired of being treated like an adult.

Vincent turned her into the hall.

"Don't give me those sad puppy eyes. I know how hard it is to be forced to grow, but there's not much to do besides following the flow of things. You're doing well, and even if you have more responsibilities now, the important thing is that you know who you are and what you're not. In your soul, you can be a child forever."

It was simple advice, but somehow, her uncle's words left her heart warm.

"Thank you, Uncle Vincent. Even you can be an adult when you want to."

He seemed incredulous, but Eden saw the fun in his sapphire eyes.

"How terrible to receive such an offense after proving my ability to give advices." He bragged with a false frustration, Eden laughed and soon received a soft smile from her uncle.

Eden didn't like balls, but she'd always remember that one with affection.

* * *

Edward had offered to teach her how to ride, Eden had never been interested in learning before because she was always more interested in books and comfort indoors than in hunting with her father, mother and brother.

"Snow is tame," He ran his fingers through the white mare's mane. "You don't have to be afraid, I'll be here. It's always a little harder for beginners."

She tried to follow her brother's instructions, but riding the animal was as natural as breathing. She touched the horse's face gently and something occurred.

A scenario that seemed real.

Other hand replaced her alabaster hand, a hand tanned by the sun and with calluses by the effort of work, the hand of a young woman. Again, she was at that young hunter's point of view, and climbed the sealed horse.

She rode through space, the strong paws of the mare pounding the grass and the wind on her face.

At that time, she didn't take advantage of all those sensations, she had to hunt down and bring the food to her fragile sick mother and her two young sisters.

Eden shook her head, returning to herself completely stunned, she returned to Edward's close eye with upset eyes.

"If you already knew how to ride, why are we here? Very funny, Eddie."

Eden meant to her brother that she had never ridden on a horse before, but she just shrugged her shoulders, suddenly feeling scared.

Nothing seemed to make sense.

* * *

"_Why do you desires someone as simple as me? You're so bright, so incandescent_." She wanted to touch his wings, wanted to touch him, but all they felt was a violation against the heavens.

"_I'm just greedy, no matter how much I have of you, it's never enough_." His voice was like thunderstorms, she felt them all over her immaterial body.

How could it be? All her being was asking for him and yet it was impossible to be with him. She wished they were physical, that they be matter like everything else in the universe.

"_You make me sin every time_."

The affable and tender sound that was echoed were her laughs.

"_It's my pleasure__, Starlight_."

The wind came through the window and reached Eden's blond hair, her eyes were fixed in the field outside her house while scenes of the most recent dream passed on her mind again, everyone was asleep and the dark sky next to silence could be daunting.

She wasn't scared, she was burning.

Burning with curiosity and confused, she was completely attracted to the idea of the non-human being who inhabited her dreams. 'She,' the feminine being within the dream, seemed to float in 'his' presence.

They always seemed very passionate, although the word love was never given at any time, Eden would just like to know who they were and why all her dreams were in 'her' point of view.

"They're angels." She murmured to nothing, noting her only certainty about that world in which she lived in her sleep. "Why am I dreaming about angels?"

* * *

Angelina observed her niece, Eden had a distracted look and the rice powder on her face did not cover the dark circles very well. Her niece was attentive and worried, she had been in her home almost every day since she found out angelina was pregnant and her presence was a refreshing one.

Angelina just wanted to understand what afflicted her niece to the point of her being so distracted lately.

"Is everything all right, honey?" She asked the younger girl Eden was staring at a book in her hand, but her eyes were standing at a fixed point on the page and she had not turned to the page she was on for about twenty minutes.

"Huh? Oh, yes, I'm sorry, Auntie. Did you say anything? I was distracted."

"You seem especially more distracted lately, is it something I can help?"

She closed the book and put it on her lap, opened her mouth and closed again, Angelina waited patiently for her niece to leave the moment of distress and saw her sigh for once more that afternoon, looking frustrated.

"Auntie, do you believe dreams may have some... Meaning?"

Angelina's eyebrows rose.

"Well, it's a little hard to answer. There are people who believe that yes, I once read somewhere that dreams were manifestations of memories."

"Memories?"

"Yes. Everything you think during the day becomes part of your dreams at night." Angelina told you, and then gave her a smile. "Is that the reason for your concern? Are you having nightmares?"

"It's nothing, Auntie. Don't worry, thank you for helping me."

Angelina meant she hadn't done anything special, but her niece seemed more thoughtful.

Young people were hard to understand.

* * *

Eden asked the coachman to stop the wagon, the man stopped in front of a huge library. Eden looked at the monument from the outside, the cold air turned into smoke when she breathed, rubbed each other's gloved hands and straightened the cape over her shoulders, beginning to climb the stairs.

Maybe science people had already found an answer to her afflictions, she just needed to know what was happening to you to go back to sleep quietly again.

She decided to look for the answers in the books.

Her feet were almost leading her into space when heard a sour laugh. Eden looked to his side, from where laughter had come from, and frowned on the whole man dressed in black, he had a hat on his head and a very pale skin, his hair was too long and white, a long bangs covered his eyes.

"Excuse me?" She asked with her eyebrows attached.

"So, it's you." The man murmured behind the long sleeves of his robes hiding his hands.

Eden tipped her head to the side.

"Do you know me?"

"_Hehe_ ~ Of course I know you, but you don't remember anything, do you?" He gave another of his strange laughs, Eden raised his eyebrows. "You told me it was happening."

Eden knew she had never seen that man in her entire life, and at the same time, he seemed frighteningly familiar to her. It was a scary feeling, she feels like she was about to say something and suddenly forget.

"How do we know each other?" The question left her mouth before she had control over it, the man shook his head from side to side.

"I don't want to talk to you right now, we'll meet again when you remember. It's going to be more funny."

He raised his chin, the wind drove away the bangs from his face.

Eden saw the man walk away and deflected the look of his figure, finished climbing the steps trying to forget that nightmarish greenish eyes.

* * *

**Answers**:

**guest anonymous**: _Thanks for the comment! I'll try to keep it that way!_

**Manon**: _I'm glad you're keep following the story! I'm really trying not to comment on grammar errors, feel free to point that out! 3_

**Reo-kun**: _I really like that readers can have a different view of the character, yet another original character. I'm a little afraid to miss Eden's personality because I'm still trying to improve my english, it's good to know that everything is in order! Thank you for reading and give your review! _

**_[Author's note] _**

_Thank you all for reading! Don't forget to leave your review! _


	5. fragments

05\. _Fragments_.

_We'll never get free, lamb to the slaughter, what you gon' do when there's blood in the water? — **blood / water**, grandson. _

* * *

It didn't take long for Eden to decide it was time to return her obligations to the Queen. Visiting the castle was becoming one of her chores too, it was her way of forgetting a little about dreams and spending time in London.

In her free period before returning to school, she was trying to do her job properly, She's a little tiring, but she liked to be tired of being helpful.

That morning, she was still staying at Castle. It was complicated to stay away from her family, but she was satisfied and for now, that was enough. Her silk and musseline dress set on her body, Eden put a hand on her stomach feeling the grip of the corset.

"Thank you, Daisy."

"Do you need anything else, my lady?"

Eden was distracted by staring at her own image in the mirror, her eyes were more susceptible than those of her amother, but not as innocent as Lizzy's, her skin was paler than that of the rest of her family, Her hair was very curly and less brilliant compared to her sister and mother's.

Sometimes it was hard for her to recognize herself in the mirror. She was constantly living other people's memories and a slight confusion took over her vision at times.

"It's all right, Daisy, thank you."

The maid nodded and prepared to leave, Daisy turned her back and opened the door in front of the entrance, Eden saw the boy's reflection of symmetrically cut hair and malicious eyes.

"My lord." Daisy greeted her by holding the skirt of her dress and bowing politely.

"I see you're getting ready for a new dinghy, Miss Midford."

Daisy left without waiting for more words from the Count, Eden got up from the dressing table showing no expression on her pale face.

"I don't believe we've even talked with each other before to hear such words from you, Mr. Grey."

He gave an annoying smile.

"I don't know what kind of words I would use with you after you eluding the poor Phipps." He said, but he didn't really seem to care. "All women are really poisonous snakes."

"It's not my fault if you're the only one putting your sex in the victim position." He made a disgusted expression and Eden deflected her gaze, impatient. "Do you want something more than insult me, Mr. Grey? "

"A letter, the Queen asked to be delivered by me into your hands." He shook the envelope and dropped it, the paper floated to the floor of the room." Oops, my bad."

Eden went to the door and closed it tightly, snoffed. She knew Charles Grey didn't like her, his hostility was nothing new, she just didn't want to have to deal with him so early in the morning.

She ducked and took the letter, walked to her dressing table drawer and pulled the letter opener out.

Removed the seal and read the content carefully.

_Aunt Angelina._

Immediately walked out, she needed to return home.

* * *

The whole family was shaken, her aunt had lost her baby and her husband. She visited her at the hospital once, never thought that one day she would see her aunt so broken.

Eden couldn't find the right words, she could never measure the pain of losing someone, she had only memories of nonexistent people suffering their respective mournings. Herself, she was too privileged to say what her heartbroken aunt would like to hear.

She just sat next to her, and stood there, quietly, for the rest of her visiting minutes.

On leaving, she put a kiss on her beloved aunt's forehead.

"I will always be here for you." She whispered in the end, Angelina, who remained motionless throughout her presence, stared at her with eyes full of tears.

She cried on her shoulder and Eden wanted her to take at least part of her pain so her beloved aunt wouldn't suffer so much.

* * *

She returned to school the next month, her income in grades had fallen. She couldn't concentrate on anything, her sleep nights were getting worse and worse.

Her only success had been in one of the cooking classes, she had managed to make a cake stuffed with chocolate. It wasn't decorated or looked very attractive, but it was delicious, she was the dorm leader's assistant and the girl had liked at least.

"I heard your mother hasn't organized your engagement yet, Eden." Eloise, the dorm leader, caught her eye with a too kind smile.

Eden was finishing cleaning up the mess the cake ingredients had left.

"Yes, Louie."

"My younger brother doesn't have a fiancée either."

"I didn't know you had brothers, Louie." Eden commented not paying much attention to what her superior said.

"Yes, I do. My brother's name is Gregory, he's a student in Weston."

"Weston, hn?" Eden nodded, returning the wheat flour to the closet. "My uncle and father studied in Weston."

Eloise gave a satisfied smile.

"Look, this can only be a sign."

Eden found that she should be more careful with the prefect's suggestions, her mother sent her a letter just two weeks later informing her of an alleged encounter with the Violet family.

Upon meeting the girl at lunchtime, she only faced Eden with her eyes full of presumption.

"You are two introspective people who were without a companion, I needed to put you in each other's way, it was my destiny."

The idea of getting married was not so absurd, Eden always knew that the freedom her mother gave her was not extended to her suitors. The problem was not knowing the boy properly, knowing that he would have to strive to know about the issues he would like to talk about and what his favorite food was seemed simply boring.

The months passed fast, Eden's mother wanted her to meet Charles Phipps too at the Phipps's Christmas ball. Eden was anxious and didn't want to go, particularly, anything about a possible marriage to a groom she manipulated to get a good contact with the queen.

"There's him... Also." Eden murmured by raising her trunk from the direction of the table in front of the chair. The angel of her dreams, a faceless smoke that caused strange emotions in her.

She sank her face into hands, ashamed of being so pathetic and childish.

That being was part of a dream, her loyalty was a delirium of her mind in a state of sleep deprivation.

Eden's mother sent her another letter almost in the same week in which she sent a letter about Christmas at the Phipps manor. She was worried because it wasn't normal.

It was a futile thought, believing it was no big deal, Eden was just days away from returning home when the news was given to her.

Eden's body trembled as she read the words in the letter, hed hand kneaded the paper and she sat on the edge of the bed, unable to stand.

The Christmas ball was cancelled that year, the tragedy that followed the family was devastating.

* * *

Her aunt hadn't yet recovered from her first loss, at the funeral of her sister and brother-in-law, she was completely dressed in black. Her aunt was just a bark at that moment, a spectrum of the cheerful woman she had been.

Lizzy didn't cry at her uncle and aunt funeral, she had cried a lot the night before, her face was rosy and her green eyes were empty. She looked sideways, on the bench, her older sister held the rosary with force almost breaking the rope of the object, she was head down and Lizzy caught a glimpse of her eyes.

Anger.

Her sister was very angry.

And Elizabeth understood completely.

* * *

"Why are they here? Put them out, you have the power to do that."

"Eden, you can't go on with this revolt against the world forever."

Edward held his breath to hear his mother's words since the tragedy came about the Phantomhiverr, his sister was no longer asleep, any family member who stood up at night would see Eden traveling through the mansion alone.

Francis was worried, Alexis no longer knew what to do and Edward was hoping his sister wasn't become mad.

The Midford manor was always full after the death of Vincent Phantomhive, he was a beloved man and well known within high society. Eden came out of her room furious, and now they were trying to appease things.

Edward knew what would happen if some doctor said his sister was hysterical.

And only the thought left him scared.

"Do you think I don't understand anything? These people are sick, insane. I could see how they looked at my cousins! My baby cousins!" Francis frowned, speechless. Her daughter words were full of pain. "What did they do to them, Mother? Why can't anyone bring them back? Why did they kill my Uncle Vincent? Why did they kill my Aunt Rachel?"

Alexis got up from his chair, there was a silent understanding in their movements. Edward watched his father walk to his sister, Eden had wild eyes and her slim body still dressed in her sleeping attire, she was still trembling.

Alexis hugged his daughter, putting her head on his chest. Eden accepted the hug, but there wasn't even a tear falling from her eyes.

She seemed agitated, confused and very angry.

Edward remembered that Lizzy was still at his Aunt Angelina's house.

Francis kept quiet this time, just watching as his family tried to reunite all the shards left behind.

* * *

"What can I do? Tell me something I can do to make you happier." Charles told when he visited her, Eden was as beautiful as a flower that day.

However, Charles could see tiredness in her eyes.

"I just want them to come home, Mr. Phipps."

* * *

Francis was surprised when her eldest daughter became interested in learning fencing. She watched with evaluators eyes her two daughters fighting in the training hall.

Elizabeth was a ruthless genius and was obviously afraid to hurt her older sister. Eden was full of frustration, her movements were corrected, but nowhere was good as the rest of her family.

Lizzy subdued Eden's sword, knocked it to the ground.

Eden stared at the sword, no expression on her face.

"Again." Francis ordered it.

Eden took the sword again, taking her position.

* * *

Angelina wrapped her bandages in her niece's hands. Eden watched in silence, looking thoughtful.

She was not a prodigy, she was trying very hard, there were bruises on her body and she seemed exhausted.

Angelina touched Eden's blonde hair with kindness.

"You shouldn't try so hard, honey."

She raised her eyes.

"I know I need."

Angelina didn't say anything.

She just wanted, if God exist, he'd stop hurting all her precious children.

* * *

Ciel did not return with his brother, his body was so small and weak that Angelina could not stop wondering where he took the strength to stand.

Next to him was a man, a tall and dressed in black, waiting for his orders.


	6. sacrilege

06\. _Sacrilege_.

_No sense of time, like you to stay, want to keep you inside._ — **_runaway_**, _yeah yeah yeah._

* * *

Sebastian.

That was his name now.

And it seemed sophisticatedly human, even though it's a dog's name. It was not the first time he played a role within a human body, but by his external appearance, his own use was paw purposes of lust, loneliness and loss.

He was an exquisite actor, however, and even though the apathy prevailed, on the outside he would be all his masters wanted him to be.

The final prize was worth it.

This human boy was funny, though.

He was too smart for his own good, and before his real duties began, he already knew that child would be a thorn inside his wound.

For him, no matter how long it was before the child — his master — completing his desire, boredom was a recurring problem. The years passed and he was still wandering the other side, the one the humans named hell, humans kept changing through the centuries and demons gained the advantage of strength over the material thanks to the souls they consumed.

It was a surprising situation, it had been a long time since the last time it had been summoned, the pyramids of Egypt were still inhabited.

There was much since the last time the demon consumed a tasty soul, all the others were stained and broken by human afflictions, and then this kid existed, his soul had been taken to extremes, cut like diamond, and its essence remained pure, from an almost blind whiteness for those who had these specific eyes.

He was already hungry, but for that soul, he could wait.

In the end, the boy was just a boy, who couldn't do anything for himself and who couldn't even sleep alone. Obviously, the child knew how to enjoy the contract and he — Sebastian, because that was his name this time after all — had to accept his own misfortune since he himself that accepted it.

Only a day after the count arrived at his mansion, he had received more than one visit only on a single morning, all visits of the boy came to demonstrate their support and apparently know how Ciel Phantomhive's health was. The boy spent much of his time resting, though against his own will, he could not say no because of his current physical situation, standing was already a great effort.

The week passed fast, faster than the demon would like, he and his master began an internal training to help each other. At least boredom was gradually extinguishing, although it was a stain on his personal pride as a demon learning how to make tea and properly dress a child, it was a personal pride as a butler learning to do the chores properly.

It was on the second day of the week after the little count received a letter warning about the visit of one of his cousins, the eldest of Francis Midford's daughters, Lady Eden Anastasia Rosalind Midford, Sebastian made the preparations for the girl's arrival.

She arrived around 3:30 p.m., the white carriage stood out.

The demon felt long before the carriage was near the property, he raised his chin and narrowed his eyes, the ruby-colored obes flickered into a malicious glow.

He had been caught off guard, it was not a recurring situation.

A small smile skirted his lips, his fangs being exposed.

It was a _great achievement_, whoever did it.

That essence.

Another demon?

No.

The essence of a demon was not so subtle.

It was something different, cleaner and...

_Familiar_?

It wasn't possible. Not precisely in this era, there have been many decades since the last time he were on a contract, and now, that.

The aberration that he heard of.

Dangerously close.

From what the demon knew, according to those who found it in this human dimension, the aberration didn't consume souls like they did, what was cast into it was about wandering the dying land and reborn again in another human body. The story that circulated among the beings on the other side was so old that now more seemed like a legend.

There was still the fact that few demons had seen the aberration, and the legend prayed that only killing another demon the aberration could come out of it eternal punishment.

It was awkward, understanding what kind of creature would rather remain trapped in a human shell rather than simply falling rid of its own moorings. Not that being under the feet of a very ancient, childish and undecided being was the best alternative, but any being who knew the three kingdoms knew well that being human was being a pariah, a fragile insect and food for the strongest beings.

Perhaps the aberration was simply masochistic, all creatures had their fetishes.

Sebastian was bothering about the situation, but he wasn't worried with the aberration, it's essence was not strong and there was no strength in the underworld more powerful than him.

It wouldn't be a problem for his master, he was sure, but... He didn't like to fight for his food, however, it was a personal inconvenience.

He pulled the collar from his costume, his gloved fingers pulled the black fabric and he walked out of the mansion. The coachman had opened the carriage door before he did, Sebastian reached out to the person inside the cabin.

A delicate hand of small fingers landed on his palm, soon a young face was brought into the opaque light of the sun.

_That—_

His eyes widened, he held back so he wouldn't get close.

The proximity had been the catalyst that made him notice where the trail of the ancient essence was coming from, an old soul and not human. Her surprise was to realize that smell, that weight in the earthly air and the shadow behind her green eyes.

That was **_her_**.

It was exactly the same essence.

Every piece of his false human body asked him to lean towards her, inspire the smell of her skin, know if his natural instinct weren't being deceived.

She stared at her own hand on his and faced him again, doubt appeared for a few seconds on her face, but was replaced by an attempt at seriousness and rigidity that did not match her childish features.

He helped her get down in the carriage.

She was different from her younger sister, although her eyes were very equal, she seemed to be only a few inches taller despite being the oldest, her hair was taken by soft waves and was stuck in a elaborated hairstyle, her hair had a pale blonde tone and almost greyish, and the dark dress made her look still in mourning and probably still was.

"You can wait for me, Lucien. I won't be long," she told the coachman, who bowed and headed to his previous place, the girl's green eyes again faced the black butler in front of her. "You must be my cousin's new butler. I'm sorry I'm so perplexed, this mansion has been very different since I last time i've been here."

Her voice was balmy like a breeze and a trembling whisper, she seemed distressed and her eyes stared at the great building in front of them. Sebastian pointed to the mansion discreetly, bowing a little forward and pointing the way to the doors of the Phantomhive mansion.

"I completely understand, my lady. The young master waiting for my lady in his office, please, I ask you to accompany me."

He opened the door for her to enter, his ruby-colored eyes remained on the ground even though the smell coming from her was unbearably familiar and take the demon to a part of his memory buried to many ages.

She was here, they could touch each other, but she was like any other human reincarnation.

She didn't remember.

Lady Eden walked through the doors of the mansion, observing everything with caution, hesitately following the butler. The girl stopped near the foot of the stairs, raising her eyes to the steps.

"Are you the only employee in the mansion actually?"

"I'm afraid so, my lady."

She smiled with melancholy.

"It must be exhausting."

Sebastian offered an educated smile.

"Nothing less would be expected of a Phantomhive butler."

She didn't close a smile as she climbed the stairs.

"I suppose." She touched the railing, Sebastian didn't look back until he got ahead of his master's office door, she stopped again. "Mr. Butler..."

The butler touched his chin near his shoulder to see her in a panoramic view.

"Forgive me, I didn't introduce myself. Sebastian Michaelis, my lady." He tilted his head down on a small nod.

She felt slowly.

"Mr. Michaelis,"

_"I wonder every second as it would,"_

"There is..."

_"Touch you at least once..."_

"... The possibility, "

_"... know what kind of texture has your wings,"_

"Of we have met each other before?"

_"if we've never touched each other before, if we aren't created for this, why do I want to touch you so much?" _

The butler stopped when he heard her footsteps stop too.

_"Starlight, I would destroy all the existent creations if it meant **I could desired you in the way i wan****t**." _

"I'm afraid not. If it's not daring, may I ask you why the question, my lady?"

Eden denied it with her head, looking away.

"I'm sorry. It's just that your voice sounds very familiar to me."

Sebastian waved in agreement, walking back toward his master's office.

There was a subtle change in the traces of the butler's face, but he knew how to disguise any other than an false cordial expression.

No advantage would come from digging up dead stories.

* * *

Ciel.

That was his name now.

A name he didn't deserve, a name of ghost. But there was no way to look back, he chose every aspect of that life, he rode it for the purpose of his revenge.

And now he was attached to a demon and his soul was no longer his.

There was much to do, and the visits kept coming, all walking near him like the moths into the light, in search of the advantage they would take from a child with an empire in his hands.

His relatives also came.

First his Aunt Angelina, Madame Red, who took care of his health during his first week upon arrival. Elizabeth who came to visit him only a day after his arrival, his Aunt Francis and her uncle Alexis who came with Elizabeth. Edward who came once with his Aunt Angelina.

He asked for Eden once, to Elizabeth.

"Eden's not feeling... very well."

It was an unsatisfying answer, but he didn't question it for more.

When the sunday arrived, he received a letter from his cousin, Eden formally informed him about her future visit. The letter was as formal as the rest of the other letters he received from his father's former partners, it was the kind of letter that was sent to a stranger, he recognized, however, the letter of his cousin in the paper, elegant and feminine as in the times when she helped him learn to write.

He could only assume that she already knew, she knew he was no longer the same.

There were knocks on the door.

"Come in." He, 'Ciel', muttered.

"Excuse me." Ciel darkened the words coming from the demon behind the door, he could laugh inwardly with irony.

Sebastian was the first to enter, giving way to a girl with grayish blonde hair that Ciel knew well. She, unlike him, didn't look any different from the girl he'd seen last time.

"Ciel."

She just pronounces his name and he could feel so many things wrong.

"Eden," he leaned over the armchair and pointed to the seat in front of his predecessor's old table. "Please, take a sit."

Eden hesitated, but walked up to the chair, she seemed shy at that moment as if she were dealing with just a stranger. Sebastian came in the wake of her and pulled the chair for her to sit down.

Unlike his other relatives, she seemed more quiet, everyone rushed to embrace him, even Francis who was so rigid.

"I don't wish to take much of your time, " She wet her lips, Sebastian was preparing tea in a tray just a little further away from the two. "I just wanted to see you... know if it was real."

Ciel supported his elbows on the table and tied his fingers.

"You're seeing me here, It's real."

Eden shrank into her chair, and Ciel considered her reactions somewhat sinister. It was like she knew and feared, which made no sense to him.

"Ciel..." She whispered his new name. "Anything I'll say now will be unfair compared to what you must have been through, I didn't plan what I'd say when I saw you again."

Ciel stared at her without expression.

"I'm glad you came, Eden."

She bowed her head, staring at the cup of tea in front of her, Sebastian was like a statue watching near the door, motionless and showing more than ever his lack of humanity.

"We've never been so close, have we? You've always been spontaneous, but impenetrable in a way, I've always admired the intelligence of the two of you."

Ciel was paralyzed. Eden was very similar to his predecessor. She had a gentle force inside her eyes, and the rhythm at which she spoke, soft and continuous, forced him to listen.

"Eden," He closed his mouth, disturbed.

Eden didn't look at him, her finger brushes the embossed drawing in the cup.

"Your brother was receptive, though few sought to know what the key made him open." She gave a warm smile. "I remember you when babies, you guys were too small. Your hair smelled like everything sweeter I'd ever smelled before, it's lovely, to me, you're like Lizzy and Edward, the love I feel for you and your brother is the same as I feel for them."

"I know that, Eden." Ciel said, maybe a little rude, the fact that she was talking about himself as if he were dead was weird, he felt like a ghost. It wasn't something he felt with others, he was convinced there'd be no turning back.

Her words bothered him.

"When you two are gone, it was as if parts of me had gone too," She raised her gaze at him. "And when I heard you came back without your brother, I knew a part of me died. For a few days, I didn't know if I was dreaming or if it was reality, because for so long I dreamed that you two were alive and in home, that your parents were alive, and that everything was a nightmare."

Ciel shook his jaw.

"Nothing is more like before, none of this is a nightmare. There's no reason to continue living in the past." Ciel told her firmly. "The faster you understand reality, the easier you'll accept it."

Eden pressed her lips, and attached her eyebrows, she looked in pain and Ciel had already seen that expression on the face of those who meet him before her.

"You... You are right." She finally said. "I just want you to know, that no matter how far I'm away, If you need me, I'll be there for you. Not as someone who will replace those you've lost, but as someone who loves you very much."

Love is not enough, never was. That's what Ciel believed now, that's why his eyes were empty when he nodded, not absorbing any of his cousin's words.

"Yes, I appreciate it."

Eden got up, putting the cup back in the saucer although she hadn't even drunk from its contents.

"I will always be here for you, Ciel."

"Get a nice trip back, Eden."

* * *

Elizabeth visited her fiancé a month later, she was trying to cheer Ciel up despite the various tasks she had in search of becoming a proper young lady. They were having tea, the sweets of Ciel's new butler were delicious.

"I was so anxious to see you, Ciel! It's so cute the new clothes Nina made for you, it's so nice to see beautiful things after everything that's going on in my ho—" Lizzy immediately widened her eyes, realizing that he had said too much about things she was forbidden to say.

Ciel raised his gaze by realizing the way his fiancée had faltered.

"What's going on in your house, Lizzy?"

The girl gave a fake smile and laughed.

"Nothing is happening! Ciel, it's just..."

Ciel bowed his head to the side, his gaze became soft, and he seemed so much like the Ciel from before that Lizzy held her breath.

"You don't have to hide, I'm your fiancé, aren't I?"

Lizzy's eyes shone, she became tense and shook hands in the fabric of her dress.

"It was about Eden."

Ciel raised the cup of tea in front of the his lips.

"What's wrong with Eden?"

"Doctors said it's a thing called hysteria," Lizzy bowed her head, remembering hearing the term behind the door as she wasn't old enough to hear what the adults were talking about. "They sent her to a asylum."

Her fiancé drank from the tea and nodded.

"I understand." Ciel simply spoke, seeming unwavering.

Lizzy had not understood his coldness, but she no longer knew how to deal with Ciel.

Everything was too different now for her heart.

* * *

Ciel shook his hands in fist.

_"I just wanted to see you... know if it was real."_

_"... I didn't know if I was dreaming or if it was reality." _

He was frustrated, he felt that weight on his chest like when he saw his own dead brother at a sacrificial table.

He was so blind that he didn't realize she... That Eden... He was just loosing another person because he was...

She was—

"Sebastian," He called for the butler, the demon bowed. "You know what to do."

"Yes, my lord."

* * *

**[Author's note]**

_A special thank you to **Manon** and **Swiggs** for commenting! Your comments are the only thing that lets me know that you are reading, please leave your opinion before leaving 3_

_See you in the next chapter!_


	7. kindness

07\. _Kindness_.

_What a shame we all remain, such fragile broken things, a beauty half betrayed, butterflies with punctured wings. — **part II, **paramore._

* * *

Eden pressed the pillow under her head, everything was so white that it bothered her. She knew that was where she should be, doctors told her about how she was no longer fit to live in society.

But it was painful, the jet of water she had received in her body earlier made her flesh hurt.

It had been five days since she arrived at the asylum, her family had been certified that she would be placed with the most passive women. Eden was trying to stay calm, but she was scared and couldn't even get a prediction of what her life would look like right now.

She was a mad young woman, the reason she was in that asylum had been her lack of sleep and her unconstant emotions. She had become desolate after knowing that one of her cousins hadn't come back and had been rude to her mother in a way she had never been before, her mother still — even though Eden have acted cruelly, ignoring the fact that Francis also lost important people to her — didn't want her daughter to go, but Eden thought the doctors might be right.

She always considered herself a rational person, and now she was having these endless visions, doing things she had never done and barely recognizing her own image in the mirror. She was becoming a little madder every day and was very afraid of the future.

Eden was glad that at least she had achieved to see her baby cousin and talk to him freely one last time, she knew that the possibility of receiving a visit from her little cousin would be almost nil. He inherited all of his father's properties and titles, which meant his time would become shorter with the tasks he would perform in his father's place.

Eden was proud, Ciel looked so strong and less hesitant, she wanted him to get all his goals.

God had a high debt to that child.

Life inside the asylum was routine, they bathed and wore equal clothes, ate and sewd in their spare time. Eden began listening to murmurs of her fellow patients, about how the medicine didn't make them any better, on how taking the medicine just made them feel more tormented.

She befriended one of the patients, Harriet.

"My husband put me here."

"Your... your husband?"

"Yes." She remembered seeing Harriet's blue eyes become blurry. "I wasn't being a good wife, I wasn't considerated enough."

Eden soon realized that the reason women were there were almost always related to their husbands. She thought what the price a woman should pay to be a wife, the things she should sacrifice.

Eden thought she didn't want to be a wife anymore.

Harriet told her that she was 20 years old and two children, she married too early and her mother was not as permissive to her as Francis had been with Eden.

"I'm sorry for it, Harriet."

She smiled and shook her head.

"You're here, too? There's nothing to sorry."

Eden didn't know, for her, there was a reason she was in that asylum. Her mind was no longer the same.

Harriet had been placed in the asylum for not wanting to give her husband another heir, because she didn't like to go to balls and she no longer laugh like she used to in the beginning of their marriage.

It was unfair.

The medicine didn't seem to improve anything either.

"I feel tormented when I take them." Harriet once said. "Some of the girls said the same, probably doesn't help. I doubt my husband wants to get me out of here."

Eden, being the daughter of her parents, began to distrust the medications.

They all took their medicine once a week, Eden took the first dose and had already begun to feel worse. She didn't want to take the second dose, but she was almost sure she couldn't help it, she'd have to accept that things were this way going forward.

Eden rolled into her bed, staring at the ceiling.

She could barely sleep at night, she was always tired. The tasks she performed inside the asylum made her fatigued, even if it wasn't really tiring at all.

The dreams continued there, and now it was all weirder, because sometimes when she closed her eyes and tried to fall asleep, she heard that voice that was so similar to her cousin's new butler.

It was so strange and sad, seeing her dear uncle's mansion without his presence, it was as if she were in the past again and she stopped in front of the stairs hoping to see him come down the steps.

Her cousin's butler was frighteningly similar to her uncle, although some aspects were different, she could easily see her uncle in the way he smiled, at the angle of his thin face and on his lips outlined.

It was disturbing, the story behind everything that had happened to the Phantomhive and her cousin was saved by a mysterious man who now worked for him.

Eden couldn't even think much about it, she couldn't protect her cousin, she was mentally unstable. She was too far away, trapped in her own fantasy.

That night she managed to doze off, but within those few minutes of sleep, she who was tied to a trunk, eyes judging from strangers stared at her from below.

Red hair strands mixed with flames.

**_Burn the witch!_**

They were _screaming_.

She woke up screaming too, taking the sheets off her, with tears flooding her face and the feeling of burning, pain and injustice eroding her bones.

They forced her to take another dose of the medicine, they took her paw a separate bedroom from the dorm, they tied her hands and feet to bed, Eden tried to explain that she was not a witch and only after, when her body was softened and tired, she noticed that she was no longer within her illusion.

She cried because she felt attached to a trunk again.

* * *

The feeling of seeing her inside a fragile body of a child was still an insult from heaven.

A _child's body_.

A small and thin _child's body_.

They were _not human_, she was _not human_, and yet she was being forced to repeat a cycle of eternal weakness.

As much as now she was a carcass of flesh and bones than to be that she was one day, he had the opportunity to witness the creature she was. And although he despised the heavenly creatures, he never felt anything but captivated by her luminous powerful appearance before resting inside human bodies through the ages.

She was a minor angel, away from god's throne. He had been an archangel, and failed to divert his attention from her, seeing her from afar while she seemed absorbed in every minimal thing that was new within their eternity, envying and hated the way as she never felt bored or disgusted by their state of submission.

She always questioned him about what made him interested in being like her and he never understood how she doesn't seen how _fascinating_ she was.

Her presence was delightful.

She was all what he wasn't, and she became the only being that he kept preserving ancient sensations.

She was reduced to _it_.

And he still struggled to divert his attention.

Her eyelids trembled and she opened her eyes, the green spheres seemed blurry before she widened her eyes surprised. The messy hair and tiredness in her features made what should be his recovery in torture.

Sebastian smelled sweat and dry tears in her skin even though the distance between them.

"Mister... butler?" She pulled her wrists, uniting her eyebrows when she realized that the lashings on her skin had been loosened. "Am I dreaming?"

She shook her lips, her soul reflecting on her face and making her a little more like what he remembered of being her.

"I'm afraid not, my lady." Sebastian climbed his glasses on the bridge of his thin nose.

"So you're really here? Dressed as a doctor?"

"Essentially."

She put her hand in front of her lips, still weak and incredulous.

"Forgive me for not believing, my mind tricks me." Her voice was a tired, broken sound.

Sebastian smiled with the false kindness.

"The young master sent me to get you out of this place, I apologize in advance for the rudeness, but time is not in our favor."

"Apologize? For what?" She whispered, her senses still didn't seem to have come back.

The butler put one arm under the joints of her knees and the other on her back. Eden accepted his arms quickly due to the effects of the medicine, Sebastian kept his chin raised as he left the room with the girl in his arms, the smell of her essence disturbed him.

He was agile, as expected, no one noticed when he warmed up with Lady Eden in his arms. She did not move, her body was suffering severe effects, she could barely keep her eyes open.

Sebastian jumped out of the hallway window for the night, the girl in his arms had her eyes half open and he realized she stared at him.

He smiled again, full of politeness.

"Is there a problem, my lady? Are you uncomfortable? We'll arrive quickly, I assure you."

She shook her head from side to side, unpurposely rubbing her cheek on the fabric of his white coat.

"You eyes," She started to saying, so low that he probably wouldn't listen if his hearing was in human standards. "It are sharp, like a dagger."

The butler analyzed her words, having fun with them.

"Does that displease you, my lady?"

A subtle curve appeared in the corner of her rosy lips.

"No. It's really beautiful."

She closed her eyes slowly, falling asleep again.

Sebastian again faced the way ahead of him, sighing heavily, frustrated.

She hadn't changed so much after all.

* * *

"I can't stay here, Ciel. I appreciate your efforts, but I'm mentally unstable."

Eden was trying to convince the child, but Ciel might look a lot like his mother when he wanted to. Eden remembered how impetuous her aunt Rachel was, Ciel was getting with praise to imitate her footsteps.

"You're not coming back, Eden. It's my final decision."

She was sitting in front of the tea table, still wearing the white dress look like a sleeping costume, there were shoes on her feet now, they were on the side of her bed when she woke up.

It was amazing how her baby cousin seemed comfortable giving orders, she was very astonished by his actions.

She leaned against the chair.

"Ciel, I'm really not able to deal with what I see anymore. My mind is getting more and more confusing, I don't know if there's another way to heal me other than being away from other people."

"But here you are. You've been talking normally for almost 20 minutes trying to convince me that you're not stable." The boy smiled victorious, Eden opened her mouth, but closed when she realized the boy's manipulation. "I need people of my trust, people I know. I'm not doing this for you, I'm doing this for the Phantomhive family name."

He touched the blue ring on his finger, Eden's expression became tender.

She was quiet for a few seconds, Ciel waited patiently for the girl's response.

"But what about my parents?"

"Don't worry about anything. The only thing you need to do is stand by my side," Ciel said in an authoritarian tone. "I'm going to deal with the consequences, but I know you and I know that my cousin isn't mad."

Eden's body strained, the green pool full of unshed tears, her heart became heavier.

Those were words no one had said, and deep down, that's all she'd like to hear.

She smiled, her cousin didn't even know, but at that moment she didn't want to get away from him. That little broken person, with harsh eyes and words, struggling to show the image of a grown and strong man had shown a kindness that she had just seen in one person, his father.

He was the perfect balance between his mother and father, with the accentuate virtues of both.

**_They still live in him._**

Eden pulled the air into her lungs.

"All right. Count Phantomhive, please take care of me."

* * *

**_[author's note]_**

_Thank you to all those who commented in the lastchapter, a special thanks to **darkangelynn5**, **mothedman**, **Miss Meep** and **Manon**._

_Please don't forget to comment before leaving the chapter, your comments are the only indicators I have to know if you're reading and enjoying the story. Your opinion is very important!_

_Thank you for reading and until the next chapter!_


	8. daydreaming

08\. _Daydreaming_.

_You'll always be my favorite ghost._ — **Big God**, _florence the machine. _

* * *

Her name was Tatiana, she was the youngest daughter of a very rich man. She had just turned twelve and would soon get married to support the family lineage.

She was a beautiful little girl, her eyes were blue and shone like diamonds, her hair had pure gold strands falling down her back. Her father was very proud of her and had been so since her mother died.

It was her first time dancing in a ball, she would be introduced to society, it was a ball in the Czar's Castle.

She was so nervous, but her fiancé took her by the hand and led her to the salon, she smiled and rested her hand on his.

She took the first step towards him, completely delighted.

* * *

That scene was becoming continuous, the demon observed with a fascination that could be considered disgusting to humans. It was an unprecedented situation for him, who has lived so many millennia.

The window was open and she put a foot on the ledge, her eyes were open and she stretched her hand as if she did it for someone outside.

But as always, everything she saw was just in her mind. Sebastian had created his own theory about her hyperrealistic visions, the number of memories she had gathered during her existence collapsed within her human mind, her body was not created to support so much information, her memory was deceiving her between what was real and what was not because of this fact.

She gave a boost to her own body to put the other foot on the edge of the window, Sebastian moved accurately, touching her forearm and putting his arm around her waist.

With dreamy, glazed eyes, Lady Eden stared at him, she landed her head on his chest, a childish smile adorned her rosy lips.

"**_If you let me, I'd like to dance a little more, my dearest_**." She said in russian like it was her native language, and a small curve appeared on the butler's lips, he was aware that the words were not for him, but the curiosity of the event was always surprising.

In her dreams, she lived her memories to the point of affecting her notion of reality.

"**_It's time to wake up, my lady_**." He also said in russian, approaching his mouth of her ear.

She winked at her expression gradually normalizing herself. Upon realizing her own situation, the pale of her face became a red tone, like ink on a white canvas.

Sebastian abandoned the touch that once remained in her, she seemed stunned.

"Mr. Sebastian, " She bowed her head. "It's all again... I'm sorry. "

Sometimes she was like a less impetuous version of his master, the two had some almost imperceptible physical similarities, that's what he seen when she raised her eyes to him.

"There's no need to apologize. If You'll allow me, I'll accompany you to your room again, so you can go back to sleep." He pointed to the hallway, in the direction of her room.

"Oh, " She let slip, not hiding the expression of frustration on her face.

"Is there a problem, lady Eden?"

She looked at him with hesitant big green eyes.

"I... I'm just not sure I want to go back to sleep." Eden looked out open window and at him again. "I'm afraid to get up again, it's very strange to wake up in a different place every night."

"I suppose so." He thought for a few seconds."Maybe a hot chocolate can make my lady calmer?"

Eden's eyes shone with satisfaction with the idea, but she attached her eyebrows and denied it with her head.

"N-No, I'd better go to bed. You must have a lot of chores tomorrow, I don't want to be a nuisance. Besides, tomorrow is a special day, " She said starting to walk down the aisle behind the butler. "I bet there are preparations to be made."

"Certainly. However, I would not be worthy to exercise my function as a butler if I let you remain distressed."

Eden put a hand over her mouth and laughed softly.

"Don't worry about it, Mr. Sebastian. I could not in any way judge your functions as a butler." She stood by his side, putting her hands behind her back. "Thank you for reaching me... _again_."

"It's always a pleasure." He said to her. "Do you want me to accompany you to your room?"

She seeming suddenly more exhausted.

"No, it's all right." Eden closed her eyes for a very brief moment and ran her fingers through the loose strands of her grayish hair. "Have a good night, Mr. Sebastian."

The butler nodded to the young woman.

"Have a good night, lady Eden."

On the first night she spent inside the mansion, she asked to be locked in her room thanks to her sleepwalking. The result was not satisfied, she panicked locked, her screams echoed through the mansion and her idea was discarded by Ciel readily in the next day.

She walked through the mansion, and Sebastian had her master's orders to prevent her from walking into danger somehow, there was nothing to thank when he was just following orders.

Eden passed him going in the opposite direction, her hair being slightly carried by the breeze coming from the window, which remained open. The butler's red eyes didn't follow her because he walked away before that desire ruled him.

The lavender perfume stayed behind.

* * *

Eden was in line between scared and happy.

Her cousin would go through unequal dangers, it wasn't easy being the queen's watchdog. Being only a servant in the service of the crown had ever been one of the most dangerous things she had ever done, being on the front line for her majesty's misfortunes would be to put life in the hands of enemies.

But she was happy.

Ciel and Sebastian had struggled to be in that position, she witnessed the hard work of the two.

Ciel was gradually becoming a man even though he was a child, he was hardening after everything he had gone through, Sebastian was helping him so much on his way that Eden couldn't let himself be proud of him either.

"I haven't seen that look relieved on your face in a long time."

Eden looked back, smiling widely at her aunt.

"You don't look any less relieved either, Madam Red." They looked around, and gave a quick hug, the two laughed that they weren't keeping the decorum. "How are you, Auntie?"

Angelina sighed, looking many years more tired than her own age.

"Trying to move on, honey, like we all are." She put some strands of her niece's hair behind her ear. "But I miss my ball's company. How's life in the Phantomhive manor?"

"Better than I imagined. It's a little strange to live without female company, but they both are so respectful and Sebastian is a very competent butler." She put her hands together in front of her body. "Ciel is a lot like Rachel, Auntie."

"I know, " Angelina put a hand on her cheek, watching her nephew be greeted by the queen. "It's painful and beautiful to see."

"Yes."

"But, Eden..."

"Hm?"

"Don't you have trouble taking care of yourself without the help of female assistance?" Angelina worried. "The butler doesn't..."

"Miss Nina has provided some more adaptable dresses so I don't need help for the corsets, if that's what you want to know." Eden explained, holding laughter while seeing her aunt's previous mortified expression. "I went to live with Ciel with several terms established by my mother, Auntie."

"I wasn't trying to be nosy, but well, you're a young lady and Ciel's new butler is... Very handsome," she opened the fan, putting it close to her mouth. "I wouldn't blame you for trying."

Eden denied it with her head, herself getting mortified this time.

"No, no, no, I mean, yes, Mr. Sebastian is very handsome... But I'm too heavy a burden for any man to bear." Eden muttered. "He's already patient enough with my mad tendencies."

Angelina shook her head, her eyes full of impotence when she heard the girl's words.

"I think you're being cruel to yourself. Love overcomes obstacles."

Eden don't believe in her aunt's cliché words, but she knew that the woman was being true and kind, it was admirable that her aunt believed in so many good things having suffered so much.

"It's a beautiful thought, but there's still a big social and age-related obstacle established, isn't there?"

"You're just like your mother at the end of the day."

"It's an incredible compliment."

It took a while, but she realized Sebastian's presence away from the hall where the ceremony took place, he was near the door. Eden said goodbye to Angelina and walked near the butler, he noticed her before she approached her further and Eden offered him a gentle smile.

"I didn't realize there was so much humility in you, Mr. Sebastian," she joked, the butler stared at her looking amused, she didn't lose sight of the hint of sarcasm in his gaze. "Being so reclusive when you helped him so much."

Sebastian was observed the image of Ciel away from them, the boy was greeting the guests.

"I am not worthy of honorts, I have not done more—"

"... Than your function as a butler?" Her smile grows. "I think I'm gradually knowing you a little more, and in my humble opinion, you appeared at the most propitious time. I know you're doing nothing but your job, but still, thank you very much, Mr. Sebastian."

He seemed surprised by her words, Eden did not quite understand why since she said nothing but truths, it was a little internal pleasure, however, seeing his eyelids always so sharp widening a little.

He suppressed his expression, the same very polite smile contoured his lips.

"I feel like I'm gradually meeting you too, Lady Eden. Enough to understand how you just draw good conclusions about everything." Eden almost shrank, he was a man with too heavy presence. "It's a somewhat dangerous quality."

Eden swerved her gaze, pushing the lips forward. The kind of immature attitude she hadn't done in a long time.

"All things are dangerous to simple humans, Mr. Sebastian. Expecting good conclusions is just a cheap luxury for a mad woman like me," She shrugged. "Maybe you're just being very pessimistic."

"My lady catch me," He surrendered, disinterestedly. "Being pessimistic is a part without substitutions of who I am."

Eden let out a short laugh, putting the fist close to her mouth.

"It's a bit funny, I was already losing hope of having a less professional conversation with you, Mr. Sebastian," Eden clarified after seeing his expression misunderstood by her laughter out of context.

"Well, I'm pleased to make you feel satisfied, mistress."

"You don't have to be so restricted, Mr. Sebastian. You're almost part of the family now."

"I couldn't be so presumptuous as to consider myself something as a family," He said, there was something feline in his eyes at that moment. "I'm just one hell of a butler."

Eden vehemently nodded.

"You surely is, and before I forget, my congratulations, Mr. Sebastian," Eden wished cheerfully. "You have also dedicated yourself to conquering this status as an excellent butler. Your tea no longer tastes like dirty water with sugar."

Sebastian let out a brief laugh, denying with his head.

"Frankly, Lady Eden... Thank you for your unique way of praising."

She joked, beating continence.

"At your command, sir. Now, if you'll excuse me, I'm going to greet my parents," she started walking away waving her left hand and waving right. "See you soon, Mr. Sebastian!"

"See you soon, my lady."

* * *

Ciel looked cornered at his butler.

"How did she get into sleep so quickly? She only sat down for a few minutes." Ciel murmured watching his cousin asleep in Sebastian's arms as they walked to the carriage.

"Lady Durless said she ate too much during the banquet after the ceremony."

"Eating wildly at important events, and still call herself a lady," Ciel shook his head in disapproval, but it didn't seem too convincing. "She hasn't changed anything."

The butler had silently to agree to his master's words.

"Or the young master has changed too much."

Ciel gave the demon an indifferent look.

"You're also undermining her, she acts like a child, but is already practically an adult. And I don't want a damned demon like you to get so close to her."

"Is that how it is? You gave me my orders, I'm just obeying them, my lord." The demon said it cynically. "Don't worry so much, I have no trivial interests with humans."

"Hump," The boy snined.

"Do you want me to wake her, my lord?"

Ciel waved his hand in the air.

"No, let her sleep. "

A discreet mocking smile grew on the butler's lips.

Sebastian had strict orders under contract not to lie, and he didn't lie. But his master didn't know about the true precedence of his dear Lady Eden, and omitting things was not in the contract.

The demon also wanted to have some fun, and he found out that the little and delicate Lady Eden, as well as his young master, was a part of the entertainment.

* * *

**_[author's note] _**

_A special thanks to **HogwartsGraduate** and **Manon**, thank you for the amazing reviews! Please, let your review before go, your comments are the only indicators I have to know if you're reading this story!_

_English is not my native language, feel free to point out any grammar mistake 3_

_See you next chapter! _


	9. strawberry cake

09\. _strawberry cake_.

_No dawn, no day_, _I'm always in this twilight_, _In the shadow of your heart._ — **_cosmic love_**, _florence the machine._

* * *

A Lady's routine was one of the complex duties of a Victorian England royalty's young woman. Among these duties was embroidering, learning dance, rules of etiquette, learn to play musical instruments and behave before possible suitors since a good marriage was certainly coveted.

With her social exile thanks to her mental problems, Eden was trapped inside the Phantomhive manor for almost two years and she had to adapt to her cousin's routine, which is now a young count with many responsibilities. Eden, however, did not have those same responsibilities and began to get bored frequently because of it.

The mansion also had other inhabitants: Finnian, Bard and Mey-Rin were the new employees of the house. All were highly qualified for many tasks, but none of that tasks were domestic.

Eden loved them, they were funny and even if they tormented poor Mr. Sebastian, they made things a little more interesting inside the mansion.

Speaking of Sebastian, he was still the same, the only thing he had changed was that now he was no longer so restricted.

"Lady Eden, how many times do I have to warn you? If you move your head this way, I'll end up cutting all your hair."

But he was still very restricted.

"Sorry," Eden said trying to stand quiet this time, Mey-Rin should be the one who helped her on tasks like that, but the last time the maid cut her hair, she had gone almost bald. "Maybe I should leave it as it was before, it wasn't so bad."

"Maybe it wasn't if you didn't try to cut it off by yourself."

Eden made a tearful expression.

"Sorry, Sebastian, I made you be late again," She saw him gently pull the wick from the thin strands of her hair and cut them, she heard some sounds coming from outside. "Eh? What's that noise?"

She moved her head to look behind her shoulder, but Sebastian held her head so as not to cut a bundle of hair bigger than he intended.

"Frankly, Mistress."

"I know, I know, sorry, " she cried. "But what was that noise?"

"I'm afraid the young master brought a guest." Sebastian reported, gray-haired strands fell from Eden's shoulders to the fabric on the floor. "The servants must be excited about it."

"A guest? Now?" She squeezed her lips, curious. "I didn't know my cousin was that engaged, getting visits at this time and without warning anything... I haven't even been ready yet."

"Don't worry about it, Miss Eden, the young master is bored and that means he becomes more inclined to test—"

"Your patience?"

"... My skills," Sebastian completed, Eden could say he didn't look very happy. "It's done, my lady."

"It looks beautiful!" Eden passed her fingers through her strands and Sebastian removed the cape that prevented the cut strands from her hair from sticking to her skin. "If it's any consolation, your skills are really amazing, Sebastian."

"I'm glad you appreciate it, Lady Eden." He spoke by bowing quickly with a hand placed on his chest.

"How did you learn so many things, Sebastian?" Eden tried, it was the first time she tried to know about his life, she had little interest in knowing anything specific about him.

Sebastian never talked about his personal life, and she knew he had no obligation to do so, but she considered him almost a friend after almost three years, she became curious about him at times

"Just a long period of experience, no knowledge needs to be wasted," he said with his gentle tone, folding the tissue and using his own forearm as a hanger.

"Always so wise," Eden jokes, accepted the answer with her green eyes intrigued. "Have you ever been in many places, Sebastian?"

He turned to her, seeming to think about what his answer would be.

"Yes. My former masters were from several different places. "

"Hm... Sebastian, you're really mysterious, aren't you?"

He smiled, his eyes closing in the process.

"Not so much, Mistress. All your questions will be asked if you ask for the right questions." He replied and Eden sat in the armchair in front of the dressing table. "Do you want anything else, Lady Eden?"

Eden smiled back. Honestly, those false Sebastian's smiles didn't bother her, Eden found herself at a stage where she just laughed at things rather than seriously worrying about it.

But he cut her hair into soft layers that made the strands look fuller, it was he who taught the servants everything they knew. He was extremely helpful and versatile, which intrigued her.

"I think you like to be mysterious, Mr. Sebastian." She put her hands around her waist, looking humored seeing him lose in the same position as before. "You can go. I'm not going to get in the way of your chores anymore."

"Understood. With your permission."

He started walking away, heading towards the door.

"Oh! And Sebastian..." He looked her over his shoulder while listening to her voice, the butler's hand was already on the doorknob. "We may have strawberry cake for dessert?"

* * *

"I'm the Phantomhive family butler. What good would I be if I couldn't even use a technique of this level?" Eden gave happy clapping for the butler's victory, Ciel seemed annoyed that he did not have the result he would like, the servants were ecstatic with the demonstration. Sebastian turned to his master. "In other words, young master, because I won, please, review what you learned today and prepare for tomorrow as promised."

Eden ran to the guest who was still perplexed after being hit, she bowed next to him with a compassion look.

"Don't feel so bad, sir, Sebastian is really hard to beat. It's not personal." She offered the glass with lemonade in her hand that she had not yet drunk. "How about some lemonade?"

The man responded with a depressed sound.

"That was amazing, Sebastian! That makes it 50 wins in a row!"

"You struck like water, Sebastian!"

"This house's butler is amazing!"

Finnian, Mey-Rin and Bard praised respectively, Eden stood up and faced the scene while by her side, the visitor he spat on lemonade and coughed, Eden took her hand to her lips upon realizing his reaction, Ciel looked at the man with disdain .

"The true master of this technique would accompany me to unknown regions." Ciel breathed a disappointed sigh. "Through I thought I'd be able to see you on your knees."

"That is too bad." Sebastian responded with the usual smile.

"Hmph, you did well, Sebastian. Here, drink."

"Thank you." The butler drank the contents without hesitation, Eden dismissed the drink as a reason for the cough of the kenpo master. "By the way, what all of you doing here?"

As Sebastian turned his attention to the servants, Eden approached Ciel's table, running her gaze through what was on the surface.

"If there was at least one cake here..." Eden murmured playing with lace fabric in her hair, visibly discouraged.

"It's only eight in the morning, you just ate." Ciel complained about staring at his cousin with the corner of his eyes.

Eden gave a small, provocative smile.

"Ciel... You have no right to talk about it, you eat sweets all the time."

He snorted.

"Tsk. Shut up."

"If you're have time to loaf around, then do your jobs!" They heard Sebastian brag.

"They really take away all of Mr. Sebastian's monotony." Eden commented wide-eyed.

"At least I can see him losing something." Ciel spoke with a machiavellian curve on the lips.

Eden shook her head, holding the laughter.

"You have a lot of wickedness for someone so small."

"What does my height have to do with it?" He questioned in a bad mood. "Speaking of work, Sebastian. There was a call from him in Italy."

"From Sir Claus?" Sebastian asked moving away from the armchair for his master to get up.

"Pardon me, Claus of Italy?" Eden asked.

Ciel raised an eyebrow.

"Do you know him?"

Eden shrugged.

"He was one of the patrons of the ballet spectacles at Lady Camellia College."

"Hm." He referred to Sebastian this time. "We talked about this. Come."

"As you wish." The butler answered and accompanied him.

Eden observed them both moving away.

"Ciel is getting more and more adult every day, right, Tanaka?"

"Ho, Ho, Ho."

* * *

Eden was sitting in her room, she was focused on reading the novel, unfortunately she could not imagine the protagonist as someone other than Sebastian and this had yielded several stops for at least a sigh in the scenes in which the character was being too seductive with the main character (that in her imagination had the same appearance of Mey-Rin).

There were knocks on the door and she was startled, even though the whole scene just went through her mind.

"Yes? You can come in."

Mey-Rin opened the door and Eden had to keep her composure, even though she was a little embarrassed by her previous thoughts.

"M-M-My lady, the young master asked the lady to come to his office, yes, he did."

Eden got up and put the book on the dressing table, limping it with a ribbon tie that pulled out of his hair.

"All right, thank you, Mey-Rin."

The maid nodded and walked away practically running, Eden went to her cousin's office, not understanding exactly what he wanted from her at that time.

She knocked on the door.

"Ciel?"

"Come in."

Eden turned the doorknob and entered, the boy was jammed at work, several sheets of paper were on the table. Eden approached when he waved for her to do so and sat in the armchair in front of him.

"Did something happen?"

"Claus is coming tonight, it will be one of those visits for work again. I'm just warning that you don't have to be there at dinner if you don't want to."

Eden smiled, a sad and proud smile.

Ciel was the queen's watchdog and his hands were never clean, he was so young and already so full of responsibility and still had time to worry about how she felt.

Eden felt it would be a disgrace not to attend dinner when her cousin was trying so hard.

"Don't worry about me. It would be a real rudeness to miss a dinner like this, wouldn't it?"

Ciel gave a small smile, seeming to please her decision.

"Yes, That would be."

"Is that all it is?"

"No." He put a bundle of cards on the table. "You have many suitors sending me letters, do you want to answer them?"

Ciel was a very influential young count with a mad cousin he took care of, all the rich people in London knew it, so they wanted to marry the target that seemed easy. After the wedding, it was just locking her back in a asylum and enjoying the life of easy privileges at the expense of the mad wife's family.

Eden faced the letters with some contempt.

"Can I burn it?"

"It is yours to do whatever you want."

* * *

"How are you, Mr. Claus?"

The Italian man's eyes shone under the angelic-faced young woman, he has always considered Lady Eden a true beauty since he first saw her dancing in the theatre when he had been invited to the girls' school spectacle.

She had grown up to become a beautiful young lady.

"My dear Lady Eden! Una vera bellezza! I did not know about your stay at Ciel's mansion, I should have bring something for you."

Eden denied it with her head, soft as a feather.

"Don't worry about it, your presence itself already seems to me a reason to be flattered." She reached out and felt the man's kiss on the fabric of her glove.

One of the many facets of Eden was the way her personality could transition from a playful and informal girl to a seductive and kind Lady the next minute, she was very much like her Aunt Angelina in this regard.

The servants seemed a little admired, Lady Eden used to be informal and outgoing to the point of taking the young master from the house a little from his stoicism, her posture had changed so much that it was possible to actually recognize her as a woman of high society.

"Wouldn't you talk to my lord? Because I must to do the dinner preparations." Sebastian went on to say, opening the door to the garden of the mansion. "Please, enter the courtyard. This time it is a counterbalancing entertainment ordered by my lord, we hope it pleases you."

Eden avoided sighing loud by surprise to see that the garden that she visited in the morning was now totally different.

"Here. Please, relax."

"Oh! Prestigioso! It is a rock garden straight from Japan!"

The rest of the dinner followed a funny turn, Eden paid attention to Sebastian's efforts to prevent the guest from scorning the donburi and his elaborate speech on the plate convinced him efficiently. Mey-Rin dropped wine on the tablecloth and Sebastian removed the white fabric as in a magical presentation.

Discreetly, she rubbed her feet covered in silk shoes under the table, her feet were not too pleased to be so pressed in a small space. She kept smiling even though her fingers were throbbing.

She was a little disappointed with the dessert, but it was delicious like all the things Sebastian cooked.

* * *

As a costume, Sebastian had put Ciel to sleep and prepared to go check out Lady Eden's room, this time holding a small covered tray. The custom of her going out for her sleepwalking tour of the mansion, he soon managed to detect that she was not inside the room, the essence of her soul was not so strong inside the room.

The reddish orbs of his eyes roamed the perimeter near the room quickly, but there still seemed to be no sign that she was upstairs in the mansion.

Sebastian then spun his heels and went back downstairs. Upon arriving at the main room, her essence became a little more remarkable, he faced the way to the kitchen, indicating that her exit had been recent since he had been in the kitchen before moving on to upstairs, realizing that her smell was stronger.

He went into the kitchen, apparently empty, until he noticed the half-open door of the lower cabinet.

_So, here you are._

He placed the tray on the table carefully, bent down and opened the cabinet doors, Lady Eden was shrunken with glazed and defensive eyes.

"My lady, an unusual place to hide, don't you think?"

She didn't answer, she was so caught up in her own illusion that she couldn't even see his presence in front of her.

"They're coming."

She spoke at last, the language spoken by her was very old. Most of the languages she spoke were like a map that showed the places where her reincarnations were.

Sebastian knew that language, when he was walking the earth a many ages ago, there was a people who called themselves aztecah, he stayed some time with them, he was interesting the kind of worship they offered to their gods.

Some humans were real entertainment.

"Who will come?" He questioned in the same language as her, entering her fantasy as he did most of the time.

"I don't want to be the sacrifice for Tlaloc." She whispered. "I don't want to die."

He had never distinguished nothing besides the language between the personalities within Lady Eden's fantasies, but that night he was able to recognize that in that memory she was younger than in the others memories before.

"So that's it?" He said in an attractive tone, the girl soon focused on her hypnotic voice. "A small space like this won't stop you from becoming a sacrifice."

She believed in his words quickly.

"What am I supposed to do?"

"I can stop the sacrifice if you be a good girl." He held out his gloved hand to Eden who stared at him with a hopeful face. "Give me your hand, little one."

Eden hesitated, her eyes suspicious, but put her hand upon his. Sebastian strategically pulled her out.

"It's time to wake up, Lady Eden."

With the sound of the name that belonged to her in this life, she blinked, returning to reality.

"Sebastian?"

"My lady, welcome back."

She shrank, hugging and squeezing the fulfilled sleeves of her nightwear.

"Oh, look where I came from this time, " Eden gave an sad smile, she looked back, noting that the cabinet doors were open and getting a brief glimpse of the situation. "I was inside the cabinet, what a vexation. Sorry again, Sebastian, the time of your precious rest is always stolen by me. "

"There is no need to apologize."

She uttered a surprise exclamation when he lifted her off the ground, she could barely relate the time she was on the floor of what was sitting on the surface of the table in the kitchen.

"It's not really appropriate for a lady to sit in a table, but as a servant, it would be diskind of me to leave you with bruised feet and no shoes on the cold floor, my lady seemed uncomfortable since the dinner."

She was embarrassed, the redness on her face denounced.

"You've noticed." She babbled, it wasn't right for a lady to lose her composure in front of a guest, Eden didn't care about social conventions in general, but that man had been important to Ciel's business.

"Of course. But just because I'm very observant, I'm sure Mr. Claus didn't notice any trace of discomfort on your face, congratulations, Lady Eden."

"Sebastian..." She let her shoulders relax, seeming to give up. "You are so helpful that it is difficult to even argue my own faults with you. Thank you for being so considerate."

"There is also no need to thank. I'm just fulfilling my duties."

"No, I know it's only the orders you received, but you've been very kind, "She intertwined her own fingers. "Seeing your face after going through different deaths every night is like seeing the exit door, knowing that I'm not the people I dream of, knowing that I'm still myself. It's a too heavy responsibility to put on anyone, but I'll be a little selfish this time, right? Forgive me."

Her smile was a bit shaky while her cheeks were very red, she was so embarrassed and trying so hard to keep her posture firm after her dogged speech that Sebastian took his back from his hands to his lips.

Lady Eden seemed about to explode with shame as she heard the butler's very brief laugh.

"M-Mr. Sebastian!" She crossed her arms and looked away. "How mean! That wasn't very kind, I take back my words!"

She was still very red despite her words, trying to appear irritated and failing miserably.

"I apologize for it, this wasn't appropriate."He said bowing, his expression was more respectful in returning to his previous posture. "Your conduct in always thanking and apologizing is commendable, my lady. But I don't really mind serving you in your needs, honestly, it's an honor to be a reason for your selfishness."

Eden felt a strange pressure on her chest with his words, her hands began to sweat and she felt a weird cold in her stomach.

Maybe she was getting sick.

"I see." She said staring at him through the corner of her eyes and then uncrossed her arms. "I didn't take back my words f-for real, I still think you is very kind."

"Understood." Sebastian told her, internally having fun with the young woman's reactions. He then took the tray that was next to her and took out the cloche. "My lady didn't seem satisfied with dessert either."

Eden pressed her lips watching the strawberry shortcake, so beautiful it seemed like a sin to eat, she rubbed her feet at each other, but not for pain this time, she was just happy but still seriously embarrassed.

"I'm glad you're so observant, then."

He smiled.

"Oh my, I'm flattered."

* * *

**Tlaloc: Tlaloc (Tlá-lock) was the Aztec rain god and one of the most ancient and widespread deities of all Mesoamerica. Tlaloc was thought to live on the top of the mountains, especially the ones always covered by clouds; and from there he sent down revivifying rains to the people below [...]. One of the most common rites carried out during such ceremonies were sacrifices of children, whose crying was considered beneficial for obtaining rain. The tears of new-born children, being strictly connected with the Tlalocan, were pure and precious.****(https/tlaloc-aztec-god-rain-and-fertility-172965Tlaloc). **

**_author's note_**

_thank you for reading, favoriting and recommending the story! please leave your comment! your review is what shows the author what you're thinking of the story and helps the story grow too, don't be a ghost reader, please._

_thanks for reading and until the next chapter! _


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